Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Happy Birthday, Grace!

Oh boy. I confess that I was cool with this whole birthday thing. I was doing great. My baby girl was going to be one soon - hooray! Let's celebrate!

And then last night when the family was sleeping and I was still awake arranging and fluffing a few decorations, I completely lost it. It just sort of hit me like a freight train. My baby is going to be one. I don't have a wiggly little newborn or a teeny little babbler. I have a baby who isn't going to be a baby much longer. She's even losing some of those chunky rolls that I've always loved so much. Grace is on her way to full-fledged toddlerdom. And there's absolutely nothing I can do about it.

So then I started thinking of other moms I know whose babies are all grown and gone and living the lives they were raised to live. And I cried some more. Because that's going to be our reality sooner than we can imagine. Just ask any mom who's been there. :) They will never ever hesitate to tell you to soak up the moment while you can, because it is so very fleeting.

The weight of realizing that we're living it right now...that we're are in the midst of the memories we'll carry with us forever, makes me want to scoop up my kids and squeeze them as close as I can until it's time for them to leave in 18 years. It makes me feel guilty for times that I don't spend with them when I could. I have a feeling in 10 years I'm going to be yelling at my past self, "You fool! Why did you watch so much TV?? Go play with your kids!! Love them. Hold them." So I'm a little bit of a mess this morning. :)

One year ago today we went to the hospital, I was plugged into lots of machines, and we plugged in this very laptop to share our birth experience with all of our friends and family. I was SO excited to meet our new baby girl. To see what this sweet baby that I had been talking to for months looked like. To hear what her little newborn cry was going to sound like. To introduce her to her big sister who had no clue why her mom's belly had been turning into her favorite pillow for as long as she could remember.

Gracie did NOT disappoint. :) As far as I could tell, she was perfect in every way. And she continued to be a really, really good baby. She has been the smile in my heart from those first cries to now - when she flashes me that big cheesy grin. I love her in ridiculous amounts.

And since I can't stop the sands of time, I suppose I need to take a breather and just enjoy this moment. I am so excited to celebrate Grace's first year in two days. To focus all of the attention on her. She probably won't remember a thing about it, but I hope she enjoys herself. :)

One thing we always do for birthdays is to create a little slideshow of our kids' first year to be playing during their birthday party. And so I thought I'd share with you just a tiny sneak preview of a few pictures we'll be showing Friday night. I should probably stop watching it, because even though it's totally happy and full of great memories, it brings on the waterworks for me. I have to get something accomplished today, haha.

Oh, Gracie. I love you.

I'm still not sure who she looks like. I don't know what her exact personality is going to be. And I can never tell just how Grace is feeling or what she's thinking. My second daughter keeps me guessing even a year later. She's a page-turning story with plot twists and turns around every corner. I never know what each new day will bring with her, and I kind of like it that way. :)

Happy 1st Birthday to my beautiful baby girl! Lots of hugs and kisses are coming your way! 


Jackie said...

So Sweet.....Happy Birthday Gracie!!!!!

sblind2 said...

So Adorable Adrien!! It does seem like they grow up way too fast....I always heard it, but never really believed it. I look at Matt sometimes and ask "How in the world is he 2.....where did the time go"

Heather said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRACIE!!! I'm so enjoying watching you grow!

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday Gracie!

Kiara said...

Absolutely love this! Over the past five weeks I have often thought just that, and the waterworks come each time I realize that time isn't going to stop. Oh, how I wish it would! Yes, I am excited for Naomi's future, but I get so sad thinking about how much she's already grown! I just want time to stand still for awhile, or maybe just slow down, just to enjoy every moment that we have together as a family.

Enjoy every second!
Happy Birthday, Gracie!

Ashley Mitchell said...

I DOES go by way too fast! Happy Birthday Gracie!

Meagan said...

Happy 1st Birthday Gracie!!

It kinda feels like one of my babies is turning one since we have watched her grow into becoming a toddler!

Kim Luke said...

Happy Birthday Gracie!
Please slow down, you're leading the way for Layla.. and I don't want her to get bigger!!!!
Ps. Please keep your little chubby legs... I haven't got to pinch them yet!! :)

Adrien said...

Thank you, everyone! Grace is feeling the love today! :)

Cassie said...

Happy Birthday Grace!! I seriously just kept reading this thinking no way is she one, no freaking way. She is just a doll. You are such a great Mommy, you can see it in your babies smiles that they just adore you!!


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