Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Hello 2017! A New Me

We're back! For the next week or so we're going to be rewinding and fast-forwarding through time as we play catch up and try to bring everyone into our present. :)


Indeed.

Our kids keep growing and are becoming even more jack-o-lanterned!

The Robert family has had a rough couple of months. I don't typically drop everything and stop checking in unless things are pretty bad...and they've been pretty bad. I don't really feel like I'm in a place right now to share everything that has been going on, but after a lot of prayer and many hard days we are trying our very best to work through some things and heal. I have a very special handful of people who have been a great source of encouragement to me over the past few weeks...you know who you are, and I'm so thankful for you!

I know being vague sucks. I don't make a habit of sharing details of deeply personal things that affect more people than just myself in this space. I just hope you all know and realize that we are as imperfect and we struggle as much as the next person and like all families do. For everyone who has asked me, "How do you do it?" "How are your kids so well behaved??" my answers are...I don't, and they aren't. Haha. It is quite literally the grace of God that gets me through each and every day.

The Adrien of just a few months ago is not the same person who is writing here today. Trials in this life are meant to refine us and redefine us. Sometimes God throws something huge in your path to stop you right where you are and force you to take a new direction. Like it or not. Because most of us certainly don't ask for life-changing moments to come our way. Most of us like comfortable, happy life just fine. You would have been hard pressed to find someone happier or more comfortable with life than I was.

Maybe too comfortable.

I was thrown a curveball that smacked me right between the eyes and knocked me out. What followed was a season of stumbling around as I was seeing stars and trying to recover from a major blow. I had nothing...no one...no source of strength to draw from during those moments that was strong enough to sustain me other than God himself. Truly, I spent many nights through the pain and tears just thanking God for the faith that I have, because it was the only thing pulling me through it. I asked over and over, "How does anyone else handle this? How does anyone in this world make it through without knowing they can come to you?"

I was granted a peace through this time that kept me sane and whole. The "peace that surpasses all understanding." It is a very real thing that God grants to His children when they cry out to him, I can tell you from experience. For no reason at all other than the fact that I serve a merciful God, I made it through knowing everything would be okay in the end because "I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

I am not in control of anything or anyone on this earth other than myself. I cannot change anything in my own power or on my own doing other than my frame of mind and how I choose to react to what is thrown my way. In times of struggle, we can flee or we can fight. In the past, I have been known to retreat...to hide...to not share my problems or even pray about them because I want to deny them or just hope that they go away. But not this time. I was and am MAD at the evil that exists in this world that seeks to do us harm. I put on the full armor of God, prayed day and night without ceasing, stayed close the Word and read every book and every article and every scripture I could...I bathed myself in the teachings of Christ. And it sustained me.

And then I put my big girl pants on and started making some changes. In my attitude...in my daily routine...in pretty much everything. I came into this world and will leave it as an autonomous person who will be judged and responsible for me and me alone. So I am making changes for ME, to the Glory of God. :) And that's why I'm here. I am crawling out of the bunker and resuming life, because life goes on. And I will praise God for all of it, without apology.

If you are struggling with anything today...anything...I promise you there is no greater comforter and sustainer than the God I serve. I hope you know Him. And if you ever have any questions about that, now would be a great time to ask me, because I've never felt closer to Him. :) Not because of anything I've done, but because he sought me out. He might be waiting for you to come around, too, ya never know. Wouldn't it be great to be drawn to him today through a simple blog post and not a giant curveball that knocks you out? That would be called God's grace and mercy. Take it! From someone who has had to learn some things the hard way lately - take it while it is freely offered. Because if there is one thing I know for sure...the bad days will come. They are inevitable. A broken relationship...a health diagnosis...a great loss. When you least expect it. It will come. Where will you turn when it does?

Friends and family will let you down sometimes. Your career cannot fulfill you. Your stuff cannot be taken with you. Even your own mind wanders and doubts. There is only One who will never leave you and who always has your best interests at heart. He knows the future and can save us all from our own dang selves. I dare you to ask me how I know that for sure.

In an effort to get back to some semblance of normalcy...we're sharing a daily vlog today. A little of the "present" before we share a little bit of our past couple of months. In it you will see for yourself just how very imperfect we all are, haha. I don't have time to edit out all of life's bloopers, so you get it all. Enjoy. :D



I still don't have it all figured out, and I appreciate any and all prayers for our family. When I named this blog seven or eight years ago (whoa) I knew the title would remain applicable forever because, in case you hadn't figured it out yet, I ain't ever going to "get there" in this world. Haha. We are all in the constant process of learning and growing, and there is nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with that at all.

Over and out.


4 comments:

Stefanie said...

"This is my life!" I say that 1,000 times a day too! Your kids are adorable! And you have 5 kids and manage to wear make up and have cute hair. I have 3 and am not as ambitious!
Praying for you guys.

Monica Chi said...

Thank you for sharing Adrien and for your life giving words. Jesus is our only hope and the only sustainer of our souls. Praying for you and your family during this time.

Monica

Heather said...

I don't know how you do it girl. Super Woman.

Katie said...

Your willingness to share your struggles and the strength that only Christ can give you is so encouraging! Thank you for being so honest and real. Praying for you and your family! I know we don't know each other very well but if you ever need anything just let me know! We'll have to get together for a play date or something sometime and get to know each other better!

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